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No.25-26 Hang Hou Village, Tseung Kwan O

Another trip to Tseung Kwan O!  This time, for lunch: to try out the popular Thai restaurant we saw before we had dinner at Lardos just across the road the night before, and to catch some rays at a nearby beach after.  Let me just say: to hit the beach after a big ass Thai lunch.. yes, this was obviously a day trip planned by a male, the gender who do not think to concern themselves with the issue of bloated bellies post-foodie fest, a bloated belly that would befall my sensitively female body ever so drastically and be exposed to all by the bikini I would later don.  Suffice to say, I did not want to subject the innocent, aesthetically virginal patrons of Clearwater Bay Beach to an overwhelmingly grotesque food baby but I simply had no choice; for one, I could not not nom all the food, for the food was Thai and I love Thai food, and secondly, I was still as white as a char siu bao so a proper tan was absolutely necessary.  In any case, all apologies to those whose sunshine I blocked with my food quadruplets on the beach that day.  That said, would definitely return here if I’m around Tseung Kwan O swinging to the beach – no matter the gluttonous consequences.  This review is about a simple, cheap, yummy Thai joint – with some notable foodie moments, mostly involving their chicken.

After that little disclaimer, I can now present our big ass Thai lunch.  The whole meal would’ve been more than enough for four people (just shy of $400 for 3 dishes, the appetizer sampler platter and drinks), or two fatties such as Andrew and myself.

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4-B, G/F, Hang Hau Village, Tseung Kwan O

I’m not sure whether an introduction for Lardos is necessary.  This steakhouse has been around for the last 13 years, and I’m sure a ton of reviews have been written with far more gusto than I could ever amass in my dark, loathsome, fatigued lack of a gut, but I will say that if you are a steak lover and you have not trekked at least once to Lardos, you are missing out on a super deal.  And hell, if I can haul my lazy ass over to this village, so can you.  I don’t doubt that whatever Lardos is doing, they’re doing it right – apart from their complimentary salad bowls.  (That, I don’t understand, and I will never be a fan of stale lettuce, sorry.)   In any case, the place always seems to be fully booked for dinner service and you can understand why; when a 38oz Tomahawk steak on the special, grilled to medium rare perfection, comes to but $800 – yes, 38oz for 8hundo hongky hunky dollars… – allow getting swagged up for Soho, allow decking out on dinners where you’re selling your stomach short and where you can hear your wallet wailing and wishing you’d stop pulling and pinching his leather cheeks so damn hard.  Be kind to yourself.  Live, eat, pray… Love..  Eat.. Fuck it, just eat.

My boyfriend and I eat too much.  And when it comes to premium pieces of protein at damn pretty prices, we are so there.  We are there and we don’t care how to get there.  We’re there!  Before we went inside, we had a good look at the signage across the street and already knew this was going to be a hit or miss.  Having checked out openrice reviews, I was optimistic, but still anxious – a gem of a steakhouse tucked between chaan tengs and dai pai dong style eateries in a comparatively remote little village with unpretentious, no-fuss food at incredibly reasonable prices?  That’s like a foodie wet dream.  We walked in, admittedly an hour earlier than we booked because we didn’t know what else to do around there. (Note:  Hang Hau Village is actually quite close to Clearwater Bay Beach, but I’m sure HKUST kids already know this.)

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